Secrets of being happy

সেপ্টেম্বর 12, 2011

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.
Leo Tolstoy

1. Forget the past

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.
Rita Mae Brown

You won’t be happy if you carry the burden of the past. Did you make mistakes? Did you have terrible experiences? Whatever they are, you should let them go. There’s nothing you can do about the past, so you’d better let them go and focus your energy on the present.

2. Take responsibility for your life

The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, Courage.
Thucydides

To be happy you should have freedom and the most essential freedom is the freedom to choose. No matter how bad a situation is, you can always choose how you respond to it. People can annoy you, but it’s up to you whether or not you will resent.

But, as the quote above says, freedom takes courage. Freedom to choose requires the courage to take responsibility for your life. You shouldn’t blame someone else when something goes wrong. Take the responsibility and you have the power to choose.

3. Build relationships

Life’s truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way.
Unknown

Relationships is where we can get true happiness in life. The reason is simple: only through relationships can we love and be loved. .

4. Develop multiple passions

The more passions and desires one has, the more ways one has of being happy.
Charlotte-Catherine

Passions lead you to happiness. So not only should you discover your multiple passions, you should also expand yourself to new passions. This way you will create new ways to happiness.

The key to expanding to new passions is curiosity. If you are curious, you will have an endless stream of exciting things waiting for you.

5. Build your character

Character is the basis of happiness and happiness the sanction of character.
George Santayana

Building your character is essential for happiness. When you are true to yourself and others, you will be in peace.

The way to start building character is by making promises and keeping them. For example, you make promise to yourself that you won’t smoke. When you keep it, you are building your character. Or you make promise to others to be punctual. When you keep it, you build your character.

6. Be who you are

The summit of happiness is reached when a person is ready to be what he is.
Desiderius Erasmus

You can only be happy if you become who you are. Don’t live other people’s life by trying to meet their expectations. People may expect you to have certain job or certain way of living but don’t be intimidated by them. Find who you are and be yourself.

7. Live your life purpose

The only true happiness comes from squandering ourselves for a purpose.
William Cowper

To have a fulfilling life, you should find your life purpose and follow it faithfully. Find what matters to you and build the courage to follow it.

8. Count your blessings

Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.
Unknown

Being happy is easy if we are grateful. Unfortunately, seeing what we don’t have is often easier than seeing what we have. Sometimes we need to experience loss before appreciating what we have. So don’t take things for granted. Look at what you have and soon you will have plenty of reasons to be happy.

9. Have positive mind

It is not the place, nor the condition, but the mind alone that can make anyone happy or miserable.
Roger L’Estrange

Happy people know how to control their mind. They don’t let negative thoughts come in. While a situation may seem bad to others, happy people look at them in a positive way. They always believe that no matter how bad a situation seems, there is always something positive to take from it. Your mind can make or break you, so guard it well.

10. Work creatively

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort.
Franklin D. Roosevelt

When you work creatively on something you will find happiness. There is a well-known phenomenon regarding this called flow. When you are in the state of flow, you are fully focused on the task at hand that you no longer realize the passage of time. This state of flow allows you to achieve high productivity and being happy at the same time.

11. Start with what you have

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.
James Oppenheim

Happy people don’t need something they don’t have to be happy. They don’t need certain job or certain level of income. Instead, they learn to be happy with what they already have. They have learned the art of contentment. Be content with what you have and you will be happy.

12. Change

They must often change who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.
Confucius

Being happy requires you to constantly grow. In fact, the process of learning itself is essential for happiness. Have you ever felt the excitement of being enlightened about something? Have you ever felt the excitement of achieving a new level in life?

13. Use your talents

True happiness involves the full use of one’s power and talents.
Douglas Pagels

There are two lessons to take from this quote. First, you should find your talents and second, you should use them to the fullest. Working in your talents is a sure way to enjoy your work because it’s something you are “hardwired” to do. Using your talents fully will make you even happier because of the satisfaction of doing your best.

14. Beware of small things

The happiness of most people we know is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive little things.
Ernest Dimnet

This is very true. Often it’s not big things that ruin your happiness. It’s the small things that do. Perhaps you don’t like someone or break some “small” promises. But even small leaks can sink your ship of happiness, so beware of them.

15. Distill your ambitions

Where ambition ends happiness begins.
Author Unknown

While wanting to achieve more in your life is good, being obsessed by it is not. Do your best to improve yourself but don’t be obsessed by it.

16. Make others happy

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

 The way to being happy is to make others happy first. The more you help other people and make them happy, the more you will be happy. Happiness doesn’t come through selfishness but through selflessness.

17. Practice compassion

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.
The Dalai Lama

Compassion is perhaps the highest level of selflessness we could have. As this quote aptly says, practicing compassion can make both others and you happy.

But of course, it requires practice. Start with thinking about the people around you. Look at their needs and find ways to meet them. Even if you don’t do it out of compassion in the beginning, your compassion will grow over time.

সুখ

মার্চ 12, 2010

কিসের এত ত্বরা তোর

মিছে কেন ঘুরে মরিস

  সত্যটাকে আড়াল করে

     মিথ্যেটাকে আঁকড়ে ধরিস।

 থামবিনা তুই? শোন,

সংসারের এই মিথ্যা মোহ

এ যে কেবল ক্ষণিক মায়া

ধুলায় হবে লীন-

  থাকবেনা কেউ, থাকবিনা তুই

এই অলঙ্ঘ্য অন্তহীন।

দুঃখ-দৈন্য-অতৃপ্তি মাঝে

অসীম সুধা পাবি খুঁজে

সেই দৈন্যের মাঝেই আছে

সত্যিকারের সুখ-

সে সুখের তরে

সন্তাপে কেন ছুটে যাস বহুদূর?

বিরহ বসন্ত

মার্চ 7, 2010

মনের মাঝে

কিসের বেদনা জাগে

সেই বেদনার রোদন যেন

বসন্ত বাতায়নে।।

হৃদয়বনে কখন তুমি এলে

বাজলো বাঁশি-হাসলো আকাশ

লাগলো দোলা বনে।।

অনেক দিনের

অনেক শূন্যতা শেষে

তুমি এলে অবশেষে।

সকল ব্যথার

হলো যে অবসান

হৃদয়নন্দনবনে

বাজলো কিসের তান।

অঙ্গে অঙ্গে কি বাঁশি বাজে

বিরহ-বেদন গেলো যে ঘুচে

উদাসী হাওয়া চঞ্চল আজ

কিসের শিহরনে।।

 

অনুকবিতা-১

মার্চ 7, 2010

আমি নৈরাশ্যবাদী নই

কিন্তু কেন যে

দুঃখবোধ উঁকি দেয়

মনের কোঠায়;

মনে হয়- আমি

বিবর্ণ ঝরাপাতা যেন

আমার

বর্ণহীন শব্দমালা

খুঁজে ফেরে পথ

হারায় সে কোন অন্তহীনতায়…।

স্বপ্ন

জানুয়ারি 15, 2010

স্বপ্নগুলোকে

প্রবলভাবে আঁকড়ে ধরো

কারণ যদি কখনো

 স্বপ্নের মৃত্যু হয়-

জীবনটা হবে

ডানা ভাঙা এক পাখির মত,

যে আর কোনদিন উড়বেনা

বসবেনা এসে তোমার জানালায়;

স্বপ্নগুলোকে

 বন্দী রাখো

হাতের মুঠোয়- মনের কোঠায়

কারণ যেখানে স্বপ্ন নেই

সে জীবন তো শস্যহীন

এক মাঠের মত অনুর্বর-

সবুজ যেখানে ঢাকা পড়ে যায়

প্রবল তুষারপাতে।

কহিলেন রাজা

ডাকিয়া সকল মন্ত্রী সভাসদরে-

“কহো মোরে জীবনের অর্থ,

কি এর মানে ?”

 

শুনিয়া হেন কথা-

হাসিলো সকলে মনে মনে;

কহিলো মন্ত্রী,

“এ তো বড়ই সহজ রাজামশায়,

 জীবন মানে-

হাসি-তামাশা আর

কৌতুকে ভরপুর,

দুঃখ যেথা থাকে

এক যোজন দূর।”

 

“থামো, থামো-

এতো সহজ নয় ব্যাপারখানা,

এত তুচ্ছ ব্যাপার

কি রাতদুপুরে

দিয়েছে রাজার মাথায় হানা!

কহো তুমি রাজকবি

কি তোমার রয়েছে জানা।”

 

 “জীবন মানে-

রাজামশায় কবিতা

যে কবিতা লিখছি

প্রতি মূহুর্তে আমরা;

নেই এর কোন

সংজ্ঞা বাঁধাধরা।”

 

“বুঝেছি আমি

মূর্খ তোমরা সবে

জীবনের অর্থ কারোরই

 নেই জানা তবে।”

বিরহ

ডিসেম্বর 26, 2009

কোন কথা তুমি

বোলোনা আজ

শুধু চেয়ে চেয়ে

বয়ে যাক সাঁঝ।

কেন মিছে

কাছে ডাকো মোরে

কাছে এলেই

দূরে যাও সরে-

এ কি মিথ্যা মায়ায় জড়াও

শুধু বিরহ বেদনায় কাঁদাও।।

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